Mary sat across from Breed at his desk, looking at the statement in front of her.
She had been trying something different lately.
Instead of pretending she understood everything on a financial statement, she had started asking questions.
Breed had encouraged her to do exactly that.
Ask.
So she did.
But she was beginning to discover something she hadn't expected.
Asking questions wasn't always as easy as it sounded.
Mary pointed to one section of the statement.
“I understand that these are investments I own,” she said. “But I'm still not sure what I'm supposed to be looking for.”
Breed nodded.
“That sounds like a reasonable question.”
Mary smiled slightly.
“That’s what you told me last time. Ask questions.”
She looked down at the statement again.
“I was talking with a friend the other day. She told me I shouldn't own this particular investment. She said there was another one that would be much better for me.”
“I came home and started looking into it,” Mary continued. “The more I read, the more I wondered if she was right.”
She looked at Breed.
“So I thought I should probably change it.”
“Why?”
“Because she may be right. And I don't want to make a bad decision.”
Mary paused.
“When she said it, I felt like maybe I'd made a mistake all along.”
Breed nodded.
“So I asked why this investment was in my account. You gave me an answer and it made sense when you explained it.”
She looked back at the statement.
“But afterward, I realized I still didn't know if it was the right investment for me.”
Breed leaned back.
“Why do you think that is?”
Mary thought for a moment.
“Because maybe I asked the wrong question.”
“Maybe.”
“That’s not very helpful.”
Breed smiled.
“I know.”
Mary laughed.
Then she became serious again.
“I thought I was getting better at this. I'm asking questions now instead of just nodding when somebody explains something I don't understand.”
“You are getting better at it.”
“Then why do I still feel like I'm missing something?”
Breed pointed toward the statement.
“Because understanding what something is doesn't necessarily tell you whether it's right for you.”
Mary looked at the statement again.
“I've been asking, ‘What is this?’”
She paused.
“But maybe I should be asking, ‘Why do I own it?’”
Breed nodded.
“And maybe there's another question after that.”
“Probably.”
Mary smiled.
“I was hoping you'd give me the answer.”
“I could.”
“But?”
“But then you'd have my answer instead of finding your own.”
Mary sat quietly for a moment.
Then she looked down at the statement.
“What am I really trying to decide?”
Breed smiled.
“That's a much better question.”
Mary smiled back.
She still didn't understand everything on the statement.
But she no longer felt embarrassed about that.
Maybe asking questions wasn't a sign that she didn't understand.
Maybe it was how she learned what she actually needed to understand.
Reflection
Sometimes we ask a perfectly reasonable question and still don't get the answer we really need.
The problem isn't always the answer.
Sometimes we haven't figured out what we're actually trying to decide.
Better financial decisions don't always begin with better answers. Sometimes they begin with better questions.
Richard Sowa, Founder – Read The Money Mirror
FINANCIAL DECISIONS ARE NEVER JUST FINANCIAL.
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